- Every year, a lot of marriages end in divorce. In the United States, it has been estimated that every 36 seconds, a couple divorces. That amounts to almost 2,400 divorces every day, about 16,800 divorced every week and about 876,000 divorces each year. Given the number of divorces in the country, it is no surprise that there is no shortage of divorce advice. There are some things you can do to make sure you get through your divorce in one piece.
- Do not go in looking for blood. You may have some very valid and good reasons for hating your soon to be ex spouse but going into the divorce process with the idea that you will crush them will only hurt you in the long and the short run. When outsiders watch divorce proceedings, they are often struck by how petty people can get. Large scale battles can be waged over simple things like a silver pitcher. The thing is, the battles are never about belongings. When you start the process, the best bit of divorce advice is you will need to compromise and winning less but getting it done sooner is better for you than winning more over a longer period of time.
- Keep your kids out of it but keep them in the loop. When you are splitting from your spouse and have children, you should be really careful about how you talk to them about your divorce and how your talk to them about your soon to be ex. Divorces are common enough that most kids today have seen divorces but you still need to make sure they are told that what is happening between you and your spouse has nothing to do with them. Explain to them what is happening and the entire thing will be less scary.
- Find a support system. When you are going through a divorce, it is normal to want to talk about it. You need to find a support group who can get you through the experience with both divorce advice and just providing you with someone to listen to you. Some people find they are helped by going to a licensed therapist or other professional. Just know that you are not alone here. There are people who can help you get through the process.
- Get the right lawyer. The right divorce lawyer can make a lot of difference getting you what you want and getting you through the process. Like all lawyers divorce attorneys specialize so you should get the right one for your case. Think about the following kinds of issues that come up during a divorce:
- Child custody: If you have children, you will have to work out their living arrangements once your divorce is final.
- Alimony: If one spouse has been the main bread winner, there may be issues around this during the divorce.
- Small business concerns. If the people who are divorcing are doctors, lawyers or dentists who practice together or have started a small business, there will be issues pertaining to how to handle ownership of the business or practice.
- Ask the right questions. When you are looking for a divorce lawyer, you should ask them the right questions. Here are a few:
- How long have you practiced law? It is always good to get someone with some experience under their belt.
- What made you go into divorce law? When you are looking to someone to give you divorce advice, you want to know that they know something about the issue and the process.
- How much of your time is spent on divorce cases? Lawyers may work in different legal areas but you need someone who deals with divorce cases on a regular basis. This may not be a deal breaker but you should know what you are getting.
- What is the billing process? Before you hire any kind of lawyer, you need to know how much you will pay and what that will cover. There are often expenses beyond the lawyer’s fee that you need to know about before you hire anyone to handle your divorce.
Going through a divorce can be really hard. When you ask for divorce advice, you will hear this a lot. You can get through yours with support and legal help.